Two Amigos

Interview by Colin W. Sargent

July/August 2019 | view story as .pdf

We’re looking forward to seeing both of you yuk it up at Cross Insurance Center in Bangor on September 14! Please tell us about your first-ever visit to Maine, what your impressions were, and what was happening in your life.

Martin Short: Wow. Maine means a great deal to you, I see. It was in 1976, when I started my career as a comedian. I actually go to Maine fairly frequently–I can’t tell you where for privacy reasons–because a friend of mine has a ranch there. [He pauses.] A farm. I think of Maine as being very dense—with trees. [I pause. Have I just been insulted? Part of the job. Short continues…] But 1976? That’s like 110 years ago!

The two of you touring together is fun! But isn’t there a rule of threes? Where’s Andrea Martin (born in Portland)?

MS: She’s a genius. We’d be lucky to get her. The truth is, we talked about having her here with us. Couldn’t be scheduled.

Steve Martin: You should let it out more that she’s from Portland. Everybody thinks she’s Canadian.

MS: She has a star on the Canadian Walk of Fame, just this year. And…the Maine Walk of Fame!

You and Andrea both were on the 1972 Toronto cast of Godspell. How good was she singing “Day by Day”?

MS: She was brilliant. Fabulous. She is the aunt to my children!

SM: She works more than Marty and me.

MS: She’s been nominated for more Tony Awards [five for Best Featured Actress in a Musical] than any other actress.

I had a dream about this interview. I said: “Maine. What’s the opposite of that?” and you answered “Maine.” But what would you really say?

SM: That was a good dream.

MS: Opposite of Maine is Arizona.

SM: Perfect answer. Like all the trees of Maine grew downward. Upside down.

If you had written a vignette set in Maine in Cruel Shoes, how would it have gone?

SM: That’s hard. In Cruel Shoes, none of the stories are set anywhere. It would not have occurred to me. I wrote it in college in California.

Martin, if you had ghost-written a vignette about Maine in Cruel Shoes, how would it have gone?

MS: It would have gone badly.

SM:  I just thought of something. Isn’t Maine known as the Pine Tree State? There was a Pine Tree Shilling, wasn’t there? Maybe that has something to do with Maine, from way back.

[*Pine Tree Shillings, circa 1652, when we were part of Massachusetts, are available on eBay for several hundred to several thousand dollars.]

MS: Now we’re onto something! Which brings us back to Maine…in 1976!

What Maine artists would you consider collecting? Many Andrew Wyeth paintings are cosmic jokes. Marsden Hartley was born in Maine. Hopper painted in Portland during the summer in the 1920s.

SM: I have in my life owned work by all three artists. In fact, I do now. I didn’t know three were all connected to Maine. Marsden Hartley… his Maine pictures are quite profound. [Steve Martin created auction buzz when he sold Hopper’s Hotel Window at Sotheby’s for $26.8M.]

Can you summarize the worst joke you ever told?

SM: I’m trying to think, ’cause all my things are so great. It’s 1973. Here’s the joke. No one will get the references, because it’s from the 1970s. “I did the Bishop Show. Bishop Sheen was great!”

The telephone line goes silent.

SM: You’d have to know I was talking about The Joey Bishop Show and know who Bishop Sheen was for the switch to Sheen to mean something.

How do you and Martin adjust your show in Maine after an appearance in, say, Santa Fe? 

MS: I say, ho, so great to be in Maine!

SM: “That one doesn’t work in Chicago. We do make subtle changes for local politicians, people and events from the area, things like that.

Please name a song you won’t play on banjo, even on request.

SM: “Foggy Mountain Breakdown.” That’s because so many banjo players who play far better than I have recorded it. Besides, in my act, I play all my own songs.

I didn’t know you played the piano, too.

SM: I don’t really play the piano, but I can play enough to play one song: “Send in the Clowns.”

What’s your favorite lobster dish? 

SM: I have one! Lobster Caesar Salad.

MS: I’m allergic to lobster, since I was 24. I had a rash on my cheek, two years before I came to Maine. It swelled up. Maybe it’s good that it was before my first trip to Maine in 1976. Otherwise, it could have been blamed on Maine. I can see it: Embossed on my cheek were the letters Maine. Allergic to Maine Lobster. [I didn’t ask if Canadian lobsters were safe…]

SM: That could be the title of this story!

What’s your favorite Stephen King novel or movie?

SM: I like Stephen King. I always liked Carrie. He’s a musician, you know. He plays with the Rock Bottom Remainders—Stephen King, Dave Barry, Amy Tan. By their nature, they’re a very terrible band.

What’s the most ‘Canadian’ thing you’ve ever seen Martin Short do? I mean, do you find ways of getting him to say “tomato?”

SM: Just in general, Canadians have a very different demeanor than Americans. A notch above. Maybe not a notch above, a notch sideways. There’s just a politeness and courtesy. It’s just a coincidence that I really like Canadians and Marty, too.