{"id":11239,"date":"2015-12-31T12:50:24","date_gmt":"2015-12-31T17:50:24","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/?p=11239"},"modified":"2020-04-30T10:55:24","modified_gmt":"2020-04-30T14:55:24","slug":"men-gentlemen","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/men-gentlemen\/","title":{"rendered":"Men &#038; Gentlemen"},"content":{"rendered":"<p class=\"p1\">\n<a href=\"http:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/07\/colin_2015.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-10762\" src=\"http:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/07\/colin_2015.jpg\" alt=\"colin_2015\" width=\"300\" height=\"276\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/07\/colin_2015.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/07\/colin_2015-40x36.jpg 40w, https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/07\/colin_2015-200x184.jpg 200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/a>Between flights recently at Newark Airport, I discovered the rest rooms were under repair and was directed down a flight of stairs to a makeshift convenience trailer near a gate. When I faced two doors, one marked \u201cMen\u201d and the other marked \u201cGentlemen,\u201d I came to a full halt. George Bernard Shaw gave us <em>Man and Superman<\/em>. Only New Jersey could give us \u201cMen and Gentlemen.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"p4\"><span class=\"s1\">This was an existential decision. I\u2019d read that the late George Plimpton, editor of <em>The Paris Review<\/em>, was \u201cthe last gentleman,\u201d but I didn\u2019t consider that definitive. I am totally onboard with the mandate that abandoning rigid sexual roles is essential, and that everyone has the right to gender self-identification. But this was something new. Or very, very old. As I mulled this over, five or six guys paused, then strode into the \u201cMen\u2019s Room.\u201d Did they pass \u201cGentlemen\u201d by because it had been rendered irrelevant somehow, or even poisonous? Did they think gentlemen were like the milquetoast Daniel Day-Lewis character in <em>A Room With A View<\/em>? \u201cGentlemen\u201d have done some starkly ungentlemanly things, not only in Western Civilization but from the beginning of time. It was \u2018gentlemen\u2019 who sullied the notion of a <em>Gentleman\u2019s Agreement<\/em>. The one gentleman in the movie who refuses to fall into line was played by Gregory Peck. Who doesn\u2019t want to be Gregory Peck, who crafted his own definition of the term? But this was more a case of personal values. If it\u2019s in vogue just now not to be a gentleman, did I want to be a part of that? I wondered further, if we have no gentlemen, can there be no ladies?<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p4\"><span class=\"s1\">I admit, practical reality prodded me toward making a direct decision. I thought, do I like a world where family planning clinics are bombed (not by gentlemen) and women are called bitches (not by gentlemen)? On the other hand, did I want to throw my lot in with a bunch of kooks who\u2019d done their best to ruin the world with perfect creases in their pants? You don\u2019t have to wear worsted wool slacks in favor of blue jeans. Clothes don\u2019t necessarily make the gentleman. It\u2019s not who we believe we are, necessarily, but what we want to strive for that shapes us. <span class=\"Apple-converted-space\">\u00a0 <\/span>As we head into a new year, we have to hope for a better world instead of settling for ways to celebrate degradation. We should never confuse strength with rudeness or even boorishness, and we shouldn\u2019t confuse kindness with weakness. With <em>Portland Magazine<\/em>, I want our stories to be piercingly clear and beautiful, afraid of nothing, and graceful. Our readers deserve the highest ethics in journalism, and everywhere else. The decision of who I wanted to be was getting easier for me. <\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p4\"><span class=\"s1\">Ladies and gentlemen, I think you know which door I chose. I just hope many more of my decisions in 2016 are this positive. I\u2019ll have the quiche, please.<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"p4\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-14411\" src=\"http:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Colin-Signature-300x142.jpg\" alt=\"Colin Signature\" width=\"300\" height=\"142\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Colin-Signature-300x142.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Colin-Signature-768x363.jpg 768w, https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Colin-Signature-1024x484.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Colin-Signature-200x94.jpg 200w, https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Colin-Signature-620x293.jpg 620w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/p>\n<p class=\"p4\">\n<p class=\"p4\">\n<p class=\"p4\">\n<blockquote>\n<p class=\"p4\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/category\/editor\/\">Click here to\u00a0view past\u00a0<strong>Letters from the Editor.<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Winterguide 2015<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":10828,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[101],"class_list":["post-11239","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-editor","tag-winterguide2016"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11239","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=11239"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11239\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":18485,"href":"https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11239\/revisions\/18485"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/10828"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=11239"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=11239"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.portlandmonthly.com\/portmag\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=11239"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}